Author: Matthew Ferry

How can gratitude help you spiritually? Well, the answer is very simple. Spirituality, ultimately, is just aligning yourself with the truth, and the truth is that life is good. I mean, if you’re reading this blog post right now, you’re someone who’s interested in making your life better. So, it’s not like you’re in a bad situation because people who are in a bad situation, they don’t find themselves attracted to personal development information; that’s just the way it is, so your life is good. So, it’s not like you’re in a bad situation because people who are in a…

The Drunk Monkey is definitely running your relationship if you are saying, “I love him, but – ” “I love her, but I wish she would – ” You see, what The Drunk Monkey says is “If my partner was more like me – if my partner did life the way that I thought they should do life, well, then they’d be much better.” You were conditioned to believe that your way of being in a relationship is the right way. You were conditioned, like a dog – pee over here. Poop over there. Do this. Say that. Walk like this.…

A lot of my clients say to me, “Matthew, I really just need to hold the vision, and everything’s gonna work itself out.” And there’s some truth to that. Holding the vision is absolutely essential. But, if you have too much vision, and not enough reality, it really equals no money. Projects don’t just go on their own. So, what you you need to admit is that when you have a really big vision, you often have an incredible learning curve to understand all the fundamental things that need to be in place in order to make that vision turn…

“I have a problem with…” “I can’t…” “I’ve never been good at…” Even when said casually over coffee, these kinds of statements are your prison. They are not true statements. They are habitual statements. When you say, “I have a problem with people who communicate brashly,”  that is not the truth. You don’t have a problem. You choose to resist.  But your language externalizes the problem as if there is some aspect of yourself that you cannot control and is actually in control of you.  The truth is, you have gotten in the habit of resisting people like this.  Your…

If your energy is low, then your future is probably not that exciting.  If your energy is high, then your future is likely something you are excited about.  When I work with Life Coaching clients I’m always checking into their energy level to discover if new goals are necessary.  One of my clients works at a very big bank.  He has conquered the big challenges in his department.  The department is profitable but his energy is low.  I asked him, “What are you looking forward to?” His answer was telling, “Nothing.” We immediately went to work on new goals.  By…

Have you been trying to change, only to be pulled back to your old ways?  Consider this idea: The world won’t let you change.  Not because the world is evil and you are a victim.  Because you have set the world up to fit with your current set of behaviors and beliefs.  Everything you have said to others about how your life is, why your life is this way and who is to blame keeps you trapped.  The systems in your life are designed to keep your current life  intact. Every promise you make is a part of the system…

I answered this on Yahoo Answers and I thought you might enjoy my thoughts. “A friend recently introduced me to The Secret: Law of Attraction, a concept I found extremely interesting. Upon further research, I found that it is strongly linked with the new thought movement. Both of these concepts believe that everything in our lives is attracted to us via our thoughts, so illness comes from negative thoughts. How can this be applied to, for example, a 6-year-old boy with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy, or a very ill baby, as they aren’t going to have negative thoughts enough to bring…

Divorce can be brutal on you emotionally.  When my first wife divorced me, I was devastated for a couple of years.  Needless to say, back then I did not understand how to feel bliss and all I had was anger, doubt, fear, disappointment and hurt feelings. That was years ago and it was the catalyst for a profound transformation in my life.  I’ve sought bliss and found it.  Since then, I’ve supported many of my clients through the process of divorce. So the question is, can you experience bliss while in the middle of your spouse divorcing you? The Cost…

A reader asked, “What do you think is the best way to infuse positive energy to other people around the world?” Here’s my answer:  The first thing to remember is that there are few people in this world who are actually interested in positive energy.  Most people are in a state of survival, which means positive feelings are very low on the priority list.  The world becomes a more positive place when you practice total and complete acceptance of all people, in all situations at all times.  This means even accepting those people who are negative and follows with the…

I just finished creating my goals and intentions for the Second Quarter of 2010. I started by assessing my Q1. In doing so I realized that I wasn’t living my over-arching intention for 2010. I have two signs in front of my computer screens: 1. Simplicity 2. My time is valuable In the first quarter, I set 74 intentions and goals. Hello!!! That is not simple at all. Didn’t realize this until I went through and checked off what I completed. I only completed 44%. The second thing I realized is that The Drunk Monkey snuck into my goal-setting process…