Fear is a thief.
It steals your dreams, your desires and your peace of mind.
Fear is the #1 obstacle standing in the gap between now and the life you actually want to be living.
So why do we give it so much power?
Simple. We haven’t learned our fears are a function of the mind’s biological drive to survive.
Once you begin to see the mind trying to protect you from harm, you naturally see that its motives are good, but its implementation sucks.
It’s like this: Being rejected doesn’t equal death. Neither does being out of your comfort zone, feeling awkward, losing money, or screwing up a meeting.
But we act like it is.
In fact, once you become aware of this phenomenon, you will see the mind strategizing ways to stay safe in a world that is not dangerous.
Here are some modern ways the mind uses fears to stop us:
- Your mind avoids losing money, so you keep yourself distracted with more “important” things, and never take a gamble on your business idea.
- Your mind is afraid you may upset a potential client, so you don’t tell them what you really think and you don’t deliver your best.
- Your mind gets concerned that others won’t understand your desire to buck cultural trends so you conform and make the most of never really going after what you want.
If you step back and look, you’ll see this is all a little insane for someone like you.
So much of our lives are spent trying not to ‘lose’ or ‘fail’ that we never have the balls to go for it, fall on our face, and have to pick ourselves up again. And if we do, most often we regret it, we make ourselves wrong and we never do it again.
Today I want to propose a new approach. One free of the self-induced prison of fears you are living inside of.
Today, I want you to – just for a few minutes – give yourself permission to think in a completely new way.
Is it investing? Learning a new skill? Taking a month off? Firing a client? Training for a marathon?
Really dig in. What are the things that have been on your ‘someday’ list for years?
Now, take each one, and write out what needs to change in order to have that live in your life? (Notice, I am not asking you to define the fear. Instead, and I am asking you to move towards what you want, not away from what you don’t.)
If you’ve always wanted to invest, why not open an online account, and set up a weekly or monthly small deposit? Acorns.com is an excellent platform for micro-investing.
Want to learn a new skill? Block time on your calendar now. Even if it’s just 1 hour a week. Hire the piano teacher. Register for an online course. Set an appointment with yourself and keep it.
Ready to take a month off? Start with 3 days… then 7… then 14. Begin to organize your life so you can drop out for a week or more, while everything continues to work. You simply have to put the systems in place. I have a client whose business IMPROVES every time she goes to Hawaii for 10 – 14 days. Her clients love that she takes time off, and there is always lots of business when she gets home. Last year she took 4 trips to Hawaii and had one of her best financial years yet.
Want to work with A+ people? Today, I encourage you to fire a client who is sucking your time and mindshare. Just see what happens when you eliminate a bad-fit client. (Hint: You open up the space in your life for a new, great-fit client to show up.)
Always wanted to run a marathon? Start with a long walk, or jog. Book the time to train. Find a buddy. Sign up for a marathon, and get the date set. The hard angle will cause you to naturally take action.
No matter what you want to do, taking some small, consistent action is the fastest way to overcome the fear-based obstacles standing in the way.
In the end, fears are just an old, unexamined biological response that for the most part are useless in our modern everyday lives.
This isn’t to say that the fear that causes you to jump out of the way of an out of control car headed toward you isn’t helpful. (In fact, fear can be good. Learn more here.) What I am saying is that fear of screwing things up, or your business failing if you take time off, or pursuing a passion are illogical.
Stop letting your fears rob you of the life you really want.
Leave a comment below, and tell me one action you are going to take today to move past whatever has been stopping you.